There is a big discussion going on right now where I teach about academic honesty. On occasion there is a student who cheats. It is so easy to cheat, but there are so many consequences. Cheating certainly effects the cheaters as they do not learn important information that may be of great help in their futures. Of course there may be other consequences like being kicked out of class or school. But it also effects the classroom learning environment, the other students and perhaps the future employer who thinks their employee has actually learned the material in the classes that they attended.
Often the cheaters hold higher standards for others than themselves. They expect their doctor, pilot, or banker to have not cheated. We all assume that they have earned their educations honestly and actually know the information they were taught in school.
Tip for the day: If you actually do the required work yourself, you have a win-win-win situation. You learn the material, your self-esteem improves, and your integrity is in place.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Act Like You are Prepared
I gave a test today and found that students arrived without pens, pencils or paper. I am not sure how they thought they might complete the scheduled test.
Tip of the day: Always have a pen or pencil available. This is also important if you are asking for job applications or interviewing for jobs. You never know if a possible employer might want you to fill out an application on the spot.
You always want to be prepared if you want that job to be yours.
Tip of the day: Always have a pen or pencil available. This is also important if you are asking for job applications or interviewing for jobs. You never know if a possible employer might want you to fill out an application on the spot.
You always want to be prepared if you want that job to be yours.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
You Only Have One Time
Yesterday I spent some time with my "friend" the dentist. He really is my friend, but more so when I am not in his dental chair! We were discussing hiring and the way folks approach job interviewing (between the times when he had his hands in my mouth).
He recently had someone who was applying for a professional position come to the interview dressed in shorts and a tank top. Needless to say, the interview didn't last long and this person did not get the job.
Tip of the day: Dress in the most professional looking attire you have. Be sure it is clean and neat.
People understand that individuals can always "dress down" and be more casual, however, they do not know if someone understands how to "dress up". You only have one opportunity to make a first impression.
If you are interested in more tips for looking for jobs and how to handle job interviews these can be found in my book On Your Own: Navigating the Road to Independence. There are also tips about managing money, renting an apartment and managing time and stress.
He recently had someone who was applying for a professional position come to the interview dressed in shorts and a tank top. Needless to say, the interview didn't last long and this person did not get the job.
Tip of the day: Dress in the most professional looking attire you have. Be sure it is clean and neat.
People understand that individuals can always "dress down" and be more casual, however, they do not know if someone understands how to "dress up". You only have one opportunity to make a first impression.
If you are interested in more tips for looking for jobs and how to handle job interviews these can be found in my book On Your Own: Navigating the Road to Independence. There are also tips about managing money, renting an apartment and managing time and stress.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Bad News/Good News
The classes at the community college where I teach are well under way and we are finally in a rhythm. The students are more comfortable with their schedules and with discussing things after being together for several weeks.
One student told the class what I found to be a very sad, but important story. He said when he was in high school, he was voted the "least likely to succeed" in his class. How sad that there was even a category like that in his school for students to vote on, but also how sad that was for him. He talked about how badly that made him feel for a long time and how that label influenced his behavior (in a negative way) for many years.
The good news is that he is an adult now and he has been able to undo the image of himself as "unsuccessful" and has become very successful in school and in his career. He is an excellent student, responsble and a hard worker. He has some lofty goals that I am sure he will reach. Interestingly, these goals have to do with how he can help others.
This situation points out so clearly how just a word or two can greatly impact another individual, sometimes for many years. All of us are so powerful and can have such an effect on others. Why would we not do this in a positive way???
Tip for the day: Find one thing that a friend or coworker does that is positive and comment on that. Spend your energy leaving a positive impact and impression on others rather than a negative one. (It makes you feel so much better as well as the other person.)
One student told the class what I found to be a very sad, but important story. He said when he was in high school, he was voted the "least likely to succeed" in his class. How sad that there was even a category like that in his school for students to vote on, but also how sad that was for him. He talked about how badly that made him feel for a long time and how that label influenced his behavior (in a negative way) for many years.
The good news is that he is an adult now and he has been able to undo the image of himself as "unsuccessful" and has become very successful in school and in his career. He is an excellent student, responsble and a hard worker. He has some lofty goals that I am sure he will reach. Interestingly, these goals have to do with how he can help others.
This situation points out so clearly how just a word or two can greatly impact another individual, sometimes for many years. All of us are so powerful and can have such an effect on others. Why would we not do this in a positive way???
Tip for the day: Find one thing that a friend or coworker does that is positive and comment on that. Spend your energy leaving a positive impact and impression on others rather than a negative one. (It makes you feel so much better as well as the other person.)
Monday, August 24, 2009
Now is the Time
Now that school is under way for many people it is a good time to get organized. I teach at a community college and our semester has begun as well, so I am in the process of getting organized.
Being organized is one of the most important tasks in being successful in school.
Tip of the day. You can become more organized if you decide on a particular color for each subject or class you are taking. For instance, for Math your color might be red, for English it might be green.
Let's use Math as our example. You would purchase a red spiral for Math in which to take notes. You might also cover your Math book in a red cover. Purchase a red pocket folder with brads to keep the papers and handouts you accumulate for Math. At home in your study area have a red file folder to keep any returned and graded papers for the semester.
You will soon find that you are able to quickly access any item you need for a particular subject, thereby saving precious minutes as you are heading off to school or trying to get a good night's sleep.
Being organized is one of the most important tasks in being successful in school.
Tip of the day. You can become more organized if you decide on a particular color for each subject or class you are taking. For instance, for Math your color might be red, for English it might be green.
Let's use Math as our example. You would purchase a red spiral for Math in which to take notes. You might also cover your Math book in a red cover. Purchase a red pocket folder with brads to keep the papers and handouts you accumulate for Math. At home in your study area have a red file folder to keep any returned and graded papers for the semester.
You will soon find that you are able to quickly access any item you need for a particular subject, thereby saving precious minutes as you are heading off to school or trying to get a good night's sleep.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Ready or Not
Ready or not.....it is time for school to start. Where has the summer gone? Are you ready to start a new year?
Tip for today: Designate a place that is your study space. This can be a desk or a table in the corner, but preferably not your bed. (It is too easy to get comfy and fall asleep on your bed instead of studying.)
Your study space is where your back pack and books should go as soon as you walk in the door from school. This is the space where you will study and the space where you will place everything that goes to school the next morning. Items to include might be assignments due the next day, notes that had to be signed and returned, lunches, gym clothes, etc.
Having all of your school items in one place can save a great deal of time and frustration when you are trying to leave for school in the morning.
If you haven't read the previous goal-setting blogs, now is a good time to do that. Here's hoping you have a GREAT year!!
Tip for today: Designate a place that is your study space. This can be a desk or a table in the corner, but preferably not your bed. (It is too easy to get comfy and fall asleep on your bed instead of studying.)
Your study space is where your back pack and books should go as soon as you walk in the door from school. This is the space where you will study and the space where you will place everything that goes to school the next morning. Items to include might be assignments due the next day, notes that had to be signed and returned, lunches, gym clothes, etc.
Having all of your school items in one place can save a great deal of time and frustration when you are trying to leave for school in the morning.
If you haven't read the previous goal-setting blogs, now is a good time to do that. Here's hoping you have a GREAT year!!
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Last Steps of Goal Setting
In order to be sure you are achieving your goal, be sure to include
Step #5- specific techniques that you will use to accomplish your goals. Perhaps you decide that you will exercise at a certain time each day for 30 minutes . You might decide to eliminate certain foods from your diet. Pick techniques that you believe will work for you. If you do not have techniques identified to help you reach your goal you will probably not be successful.
Step #6- Keep track of how you are progressing. Determine a time each day or each week to evaluate how you are progressing toward your goal. Using our example in the previous blogs, it would be helpful to record weekly (on the same day) what your weight is. Be sure you are writing this information down so you can review your progress from the beginning. If you are not progressing as you planned, then you may want to revise your techniques.
I hope you find this approach helpful for you. Many of you will be starting school soon. Perhaps setting goals regarding your grades, attendance or study habits would be a good idea. You may also want to comment on how goal setting is working for you. Best of luck.
Step #5- specific techniques that you will use to accomplish your goals. Perhaps you decide that you will exercise at a certain time each day for 30 minutes . You might decide to eliminate certain foods from your diet. Pick techniques that you believe will work for you. If you do not have techniques identified to help you reach your goal you will probably not be successful.
Step #6- Keep track of how you are progressing. Determine a time each day or each week to evaluate how you are progressing toward your goal. Using our example in the previous blogs, it would be helpful to record weekly (on the same day) what your weight is. Be sure you are writing this information down so you can review your progress from the beginning. If you are not progressing as you planned, then you may want to revise your techniques.
I hope you find this approach helpful for you. Many of you will be starting school soon. Perhaps setting goals regarding your grades, attendance or study habits would be a good idea. You may also want to comment on how goal setting is working for you. Best of luck.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Goal Setting Tips #3 and #4
I hope steps one and two of goal setting are going well. Here are steps #3 and #4 for goal setting.
Step #3- State your goals in a positive instead of negative way. If we are using the same example from last post and you are "trying to lose weight" it is important to state "I will lose 10 pounds in 4 weeks" instead of "I will not eat too much". Your mind will help you picture whatever your goal is, so instead of too much food, your mind will picture you as you would look 10 lbs. lighter.
Step #4- When setting your goals, break them into time frames. Perhaps at the end of your weight lose efforts (5 months) you hope to have lost 20 lbs. You might set weekly goals of losing 1 lb. a week. This will help you know if you are heading toward your long term goal successfully.
Next time I will talk about measuring your progress to see if what you are doing is working.
Step #3- State your goals in a positive instead of negative way. If we are using the same example from last post and you are "trying to lose weight" it is important to state "I will lose 10 pounds in 4 weeks" instead of "I will not eat too much". Your mind will help you picture whatever your goal is, so instead of too much food, your mind will picture you as you would look 10 lbs. lighter.
Step #4- When setting your goals, break them into time frames. Perhaps at the end of your weight lose efforts (5 months) you hope to have lost 20 lbs. You might set weekly goals of losing 1 lb. a week. This will help you know if you are heading toward your long term goal successfully.
Next time I will talk about measuring your progress to see if what you are doing is working.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Goal Setting Tips 1 and 2
Perhaps by now you have given some thought to a goal you want to set. If so, you are ready for
Tip #1- Write about your goals. First of all, write out a copy of your specific goal and put it on your bathroom mirror, the refrigerator, or some obvious place where you will see it each day. It is also helpful to write about your goal, perhaps in a journal. This will help you clarify what you have done toward your goal and what needs to be done to accomplish your goal.
Tip #2- Make your goal very specific. You might decide you want to "lose weight", but if you don't decide how much weight, it will be difficult to determine if you have been reached your goal. If you decide you are going to lose 10 lbs. in 4 weeks, at the end of 4 weeks, you can easily know if you have successfully completed your goal.
Try writing about you goal over the next few days. Good luck!!
Tip #1- Write about your goals. First of all, write out a copy of your specific goal and put it on your bathroom mirror, the refrigerator, or some obvious place where you will see it each day. It is also helpful to write about your goal, perhaps in a journal. This will help you clarify what you have done toward your goal and what needs to be done to accomplish your goal.
Tip #2- Make your goal very specific. You might decide you want to "lose weight", but if you don't decide how much weight, it will be difficult to determine if you have been reached your goal. If you decide you are going to lose 10 lbs. in 4 weeks, at the end of 4 weeks, you can easily know if you have successfully completed your goal.
Try writing about you goal over the next few days. Good luck!!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Success is....
The reunion is now over. What a great time (and it wasn't even MY reunion). Several days were spent thinking about the people we had not seen since the last reunion as well as recalling various conversations of which we were a part. The most interesting thing to me is the many ways in which "success" was defined. The bottom line is that "success" is the way you define it.
As a teen or young person you probably have lots of ideas of what success means to you....the awesome car, making lots of money, the big house, lots of kids, helping others, etc.
From the perspective of adults at the reunion, many of whom are retired, success seemed to be subtly defined by enjoying grandchildren, the skills and knowledge their children have acquired, and the ways they had contributed to make the world a better place. No one said these things specifically, but it did come through in conversations. So what is "success" to you?
Tip of the Day- Decide what "success" means to you. Set goals to attain success. When you set goals, you work on them and they work on you.
More on goal setting will follow.
As a teen or young person you probably have lots of ideas of what success means to you....the awesome car, making lots of money, the big house, lots of kids, helping others, etc.
From the perspective of adults at the reunion, many of whom are retired, success seemed to be subtly defined by enjoying grandchildren, the skills and knowledge their children have acquired, and the ways they had contributed to make the world a better place. No one said these things specifically, but it did come through in conversations. So what is "success" to you?
Tip of the Day- Decide what "success" means to you. Set goals to attain success. When you set goals, you work on them and they work on you.
More on goal setting will follow.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Those on the Inside
My husband and I are attending his high school reunion this weekend. (I know some of you reading this blog are probably still in high school and have not even thought about reunions, but keep reading.)
In preparation we have reviewed his high school annuals trying to remember names, faces and things about his class members. It seems often times the things people remember are who was the cutest, who got in trouble, who was voted "most likely to succeed". What has really been interesting is that it seems the ones who were thought to be the most likely to succeed often were just regular people, and those who weren't as attractive or smart or popular actually ended up doing very meaningful things with their lives, for their families and for society.
Tip for the day- We all have gifts and strengths. Some we can readily see like good looks, an outgoing personality, or sports skills. For others, their gifts and strengths are hidden deep inside, like determination, integrity, persistence and resiliency. Which strengths do you think will still be with someone when they attend their 45th high school reunion?
We have attended several reunions and thoroughly enjoyed reconnecting with people. I hope you will look forward to yours.
In preparation we have reviewed his high school annuals trying to remember names, faces and things about his class members. It seems often times the things people remember are who was the cutest, who got in trouble, who was voted "most likely to succeed". What has really been interesting is that it seems the ones who were thought to be the most likely to succeed often were just regular people, and those who weren't as attractive or smart or popular actually ended up doing very meaningful things with their lives, for their families and for society.
Tip for the day- We all have gifts and strengths. Some we can readily see like good looks, an outgoing personality, or sports skills. For others, their gifts and strengths are hidden deep inside, like determination, integrity, persistence and resiliency. Which strengths do you think will still be with someone when they attend their 45th high school reunion?
We have attended several reunions and thoroughly enjoyed reconnecting with people. I hope you will look forward to yours.
Monday, June 29, 2009
They Will Fill in the Blanks
Have you ever met someone or been with someone and thought, "I just don't know about this person" or "I wonder if they are mad, sad, happy"? People rely a great deal on the nonverbal messages we send. Nonverbal messages include your facial expressions and your body language. If we do not communicate with words about who we are or what we are thinking, others will fill in the blanks and come up with their own ideas.
Tip of the day: Be sure that your nonverbal language is communicating an accurate message of what you intend for others to receive. Asking friends about the nonverbal messages you send is a great way to see how others see you.
I know you all have great tips as well. Feel free to share those in the "comments" section of this blog.
Happy Monday!
Tip of the day: Be sure that your nonverbal language is communicating an accurate message of what you intend for others to receive. Asking friends about the nonverbal messages you send is a great way to see how others see you.
I know you all have great tips as well. Feel free to share those in the "comments" section of this blog.
Happy Monday!
Friday, June 19, 2009
Take Care of it the Night Before
Have you ever filled up your gas tank and ended up with gasoline on your hands, or maybe even your clothes?
Tip for today- Fill up your gas tank at the end of the day rather than in the morning before you go to work or school. Then if some gas should splash on your hands or clothes, you will not have to smell it all day.
Your peers and coworkers will greatly appreciated your advanced planning as well.
Tip for today- Fill up your gas tank at the end of the day rather than in the morning before you go to work or school. Then if some gas should splash on your hands or clothes, you will not have to smell it all day.
Your peers and coworkers will greatly appreciated your advanced planning as well.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Handy
As you job interview, look for a place to live or start a project you may find you are collecting lots of business cards. These cards are good references for peoples' names and contact numbers, but often get scattered or lost if they are not organized.
Tip #7- Go to your local office supply store and pick up a package of business card holders. (Some people use the plastic sleeves that hold sports cards for collections.) Each sleeve will hold 20 cards that can each be quickly reviewed when you are looking for one.
Tip #7-A- You might want to use a separate sleeve for job related cards and another for fun projects or a hobby.
By keeping the business card sleeves and other papers related to the same purpose in a separate loose leaf notebook you will save lots of time and feel much more in control.
Tip #7- Go to your local office supply store and pick up a package of business card holders. (Some people use the plastic sleeves that hold sports cards for collections.) Each sleeve will hold 20 cards that can each be quickly reviewed when you are looking for one.
Tip #7-A- You might want to use a separate sleeve for job related cards and another for fun projects or a hobby.
By keeping the business card sleeves and other papers related to the same purpose in a separate loose leaf notebook you will save lots of time and feel much more in control.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Other's Accomplishments
Remember when you accomplished something that made you feel very proud? You felt all good inside and very confident and may have wanted to share it with the world? You probably also remember those people who got excited with you and shared in your joy. You might even be able to name them years later and remember where you were when they were excited with/for you.
Tip 6- Whenever you become aware of something that someone else has done, let them know how happy, excited and/or proud you are for them. You can do this by telling them, sending a note, or maybe even a little gift. You might also pass on their accomplishment to someone else who will be excited as well.
You will feel much better yourself when you look past yourself, and remember that the world really is not just about you! (You are a very important part of it though.)
Tip 6- Whenever you become aware of something that someone else has done, let them know how happy, excited and/or proud you are for them. You can do this by telling them, sending a note, or maybe even a little gift. You might also pass on their accomplishment to someone else who will be excited as well.
You will feel much better yourself when you look past yourself, and remember that the world really is not just about you! (You are a very important part of it though.)
Monday, June 8, 2009
What a Smart Lady
She came out of no where. A sheepish looking woman who might not have been noticed on the street, until.......she sang before England and the world. I am referring, of course, to Susan Boyles. All of a sudden her world was turned upside down and things apparently became overwhelming. She did the right thing.....she sought help.
Tip #5- When things in your world become overwhelming and you are not able to handle your normal responsibilities, seek the help of a trusted friend or professional in the mental health field to help you deal in a healthy way with those things that are bothering you.
If you don't know how to find someone and you live in the U.S. try calling 211. Most communities have an information and referral service that is accessed by calling 211. They can inform you of various agencies and professionals who may be located close to you who you can call.
That is a smart decision!
Tip #5- When things in your world become overwhelming and you are not able to handle your normal responsibilities, seek the help of a trusted friend or professional in the mental health field to help you deal in a healthy way with those things that are bothering you.
If you don't know how to find someone and you live in the U.S. try calling 211. Most communities have an information and referral service that is accessed by calling 211. They can inform you of various agencies and professionals who may be located close to you who you can call.
That is a smart decision!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Their Own Way
Have you ever worked on a project, planned a party or decided how to approach a problem with someone else and felt like the way they were doing it was just not how you thought it should be done?
I have recently talked with several people who feel the way their friends are approaching medical decisions is just not right because that is not the way they would do it. They have their own opinions about how things should be done.
So, Tip #4-When you feel someone is not doing something the right way or the way you would do it, remember what my good friend Frances says, "Everyone has to get there their own way."
I have recently talked with several people who feel the way their friends are approaching medical decisions is just not right because that is not the way they would do it. They have their own opinions about how things should be done.
So, Tip #4-When you feel someone is not doing something the right way or the way you would do it, remember what my good friend Frances says, "Everyone has to get there their own way."
Monday, June 1, 2009
Never Too Late
This time of year seems incredibly busy. But it is never too late to send a "thank you" note to someone who has done something nice for you. Graduation is just around the corner for many and Memorial Day has just past. Many times "thank you" notes are expected, for instance when someone gives you a gift. However, expected or not, they are always appreciated.
Tip #3- Keep several blank note cards in your back pack, purse or car with some stamps so that you can quickly send a note to someone as you think about them. Your note may "make their day"!!
Tip #3- Keep several blank note cards in your back pack, purse or car with some stamps so that you can quickly send a note to someone as you think about them. Your note may "make their day"!!
Friday, May 22, 2009
So Much Wasted Energy
I listened to the news this morning about two teens who attacked a stroke victim in a wheel chair. The more I think about this situation, the madder I get. Bullies always take their aggression out on someone so much weaker than themselves?
So, Tip #2
It takes way more energy to frown and be aggressive toward others than it does to smile and be kind. (Besides that-being kind gets you much further down the road to independence!!)
It is also a fun challenge to be overly kind to the fussy or irritated grocery clerk or sales clerk, or restaurant server. It will really throw them off!
Have a great day!
So, Tip #2
It takes way more energy to frown and be aggressive toward others than it does to smile and be kind. (Besides that-being kind gets you much further down the road to independence!!)
It is also a fun challenge to be overly kind to the fussy or irritated grocery clerk or sales clerk, or restaurant server. It will really throw them off!
Have a great day!
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Three and one half year birth
About three and one half years ago I was inspired to take on a project I had never thought I would do. I was inspired by a teen we were mentoring at a local residential center for youth. As she asked a number of questions about how to open a bank account, how to rent an apartment, and how to look for a job, I realized she would benefit from a book about these issues.
I browsed our local book store and realized that there was no one book containing all of the information she was asking about. When I expressed my frustration to my husband about not finding a book containing the information I was seeking, he said, "Well, write one!". So I did!!
And today I received the first printed copy! And the book is now available through Amazon.com!!
So I have decided to include some of the tips from the book, On Your Own-Navigating the Road to Independence, in this blog.
Tip #1- When setting up a budget, set aside 10% of your paycheck or income for any unforeseen emergencies. Life is full of unexpected expenses so you want to be prepared to deal with these.
I browsed our local book store and realized that there was no one book containing all of the information she was asking about. When I expressed my frustration to my husband about not finding a book containing the information I was seeking, he said, "Well, write one!". So I did!!
And today I received the first printed copy! And the book is now available through Amazon.com!!
So I have decided to include some of the tips from the book, On Your Own-Navigating the Road to Independence, in this blog.
Tip #1- When setting up a budget, set aside 10% of your paycheck or income for any unforeseen emergencies. Life is full of unexpected expenses so you want to be prepared to deal with these.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Just a few words
Just as I was starting this blog I received an email from an adult student telling me that a few words I had said in a casual conversation with her kept her from making a big mistake. I vaguely remember the conversation. It occurred to me that many times we say things in passing or informally that others take very seriously even though we may not remember saying them.
As individuals start on their road to independence and demonstrate more maturity, people begin to place more value in their comments and opinions. The responsibility for choosing words carefully and explaining yourself fully becomes much more important as one travels down the road to independence.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Why not share?
After years of teaching and working with teenagers and young adults I thought it might be fun and helpful to share some of the tips I have learned to help people successfully gain independence. I know there are many tips and techniques others have learned as well. Why not share these? Three important things to do to get started are create a budget, write a resume and save for emergencies.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)